Terami.com Blog

Last night we attended a benefit performance along with about 120 other people who got to see Fiona Apple and Jon Brion perform for two hours. No setlist. No rehearsals. Just their insane energy, a ton of songs, and a couple equally rambunctious guests. To say that the show was good would be an understatement. To see artists of that caliber just play as though they were in a living room? There are few words to describe it, other than saying it was indescribable and worth the hefty cost of admission.

I've been thinking about why a good performance like theirs is so rare. I've come up with this suggestion:

There are many levels to musicality.

THE STUDENT LEVEL
...in which you learn to navigate an instrument, articulate musical urges, and overcome hurdles of frustration. Within the student level, you explore your natural proclivities, but they aren't yet developed. Your biggest obstacles here are time and patience. Talent means very little because your focus should be on skill. Honestly, I believe that natural talent at this point can be a hindrance. It makes you itchy.

COMPETENCY
Once you're a student of music, you're a student for life. I'm hardly suggesting you stop learning. But once you pass your initial training, you reach competency. Within this level, you find your comfort zone. You become good at some facet of music - whether it's something broad, or something very specific. You can impress your friends, impress yourself, and become excited that all those years of lessons finally paid off. However, becoming competent is the most dangerous level of music - because it's risky that you'll settle here.

ARTISTS
Beyond competency, is the artist level. Here, you can actually begin to break out of the box and mess around. You'll really develop style, freedom, and dexterity. For the first time, you'll find yourself able to make music without thinking about it. Music will seem as though it comes to you - from somewhere outside yourself. It's exciting to be here, or even briefly touch on the fringes of this level. Unfortunately, at this level it's easy to release discipline and just go nuts with your new found creativity and independence...you might become indulgent...so it's important to remember that beyond this level is something even greater.

TRANSCENDENCE
At their peak, musicians can transcend. They can transcend language, place, and time. Through them, inarticulate thoughts and emotions can channel. The music and its structure seem to fall away and something else emerges. Music becomes its own language and the musician steps aside. In performance, the performer no longer performs - they become.

These levels apply to each area of music - playing an instrument, songwriting, composing, performance, etc. So, really, you can be at several levels at once...that's what it feels like for me, at least. In some areas, I readily admit that I'm still a student. Literally. I've returned to music study over the past two years. I go to lessons every week. I do homework, practice, the whole bit. In other areas, I know I'm competent. Sometimes, if I'm lucky, I can let my competency go and emerge as an artist. This usually happens in private - when I stop thinking.

I'm still waiting for transcendence.

What I witnessed last night was transcendence. There were moments in the performance where I had to pick my jaw up off the floor, where thoughts zoomed through my head at a crushing rate, smacking clear against my heart. I didn't know what hit me. This wasn't competency, this wasn't a singer with a guitarist, this wasn't a plea for stardom or even showmanship. This was the real deal and it humbled and inspired me to reach for more.

It makes me wonder what people with that level of musicality must think of themselves. Not one of the artists on stage last night seemed to think they were fantastic. They just did what they do. Maybe they thought it was a good show - maybe they've had much better - maybe it was the bestest thing they ever-done-did. Who knows. Maybe it's better left a mystery.