OK. I'm not going to fight it. I'm not where I want to be and despite an optimism that I exhaust myself trying to keep, I'm just going to let it go.
It's all getting scrapped. Dumped.
I have to kick the Aug deadline and shoot for a better album. I've grown a lot during this process...I know that. It hurts to let go of these songs, and I'm desperately afraid of what's going to happen to me now that I'm calling off the album. Not THE album. This VERSION of the album. Can I write anything better than what I have? I've got to pray so. But fuckit. This isn't where I thought I would be.
